Wednesday, January 12, 2011

FIVE AWESOME WAYS TO MAKE RELATIONSHIPS WORK

Relationships - the 'war-ships' of your otherwise peaceful life. But well, since life doesnt seem 'complete' without them, let me present you with some awesome ways to make a relationship work. And you better implement these - for they arent coming from just any random single dude.. they are from a 'war veteran' whos become just like India now - huge army but no damn wars.

(1) DONT EXPECT THE OTHER PERSON TO LOVE YOU THE WAY YOU LOVE THEM

Sometime in the past, a wise dude said (after getting drunk and remembering the good times with his ex) - 'Expectations kill relationships'. He was fuckin right. And the No 1 in the expectations list? Wanting the other person to love you the way you adore them. Thats crap actually. Everyone has their own way of showing affection. Some people go "I love you"-ing every 5 seconds while some are reclusive and dont say that often.. but that doesnt mean they love any less.

Point is to take care of your love - period. And let the other person take care of theirs. Period.

(2) SPACE - AND MORE SPACE

I know theres an awesome saying - 'If you want Space, Join NASA!' but it doesnt work in relationships. They need space. You and your partner need their personal space. You know what that does? Enhances mutual respect. And thats what counts. Ofcourse how much respect you need- is subjective but when you learn to define the actual limits, trust me- relationships rock; instead of being 'on the rocks'.

#CHEESY LINE ATTACK

And heres the typical emotional and cheesy line suited for such "love advice posts" - When you give your relationship its logically defined space - it fills that up with love and nothing else.

#ATTACK OVER - RESUME NORMAL LIFE


(3) BE HONEST - DIPLOMATICALLY - ESP IN FIGHTS

If you love someone, you wouldnt want to hurt them right? Also, you wouldnt wanna be deceptive. So be honest in your feelings about things - esp if you dont like something about the other person - but say that in a non-hurtful way.. esp during fights. We say ridiculous things i.e. hit 'below the belt' during weak moments which comes back later to haunt us.


(4) HAVE A POSITIVE EGO - NOT DESTRUCTIVE ONE

Destructive Ego - I am the best and always right. Others can fuck themselves.

Positive Ego - I wont compromise on my self-esteem but I will decide on something after logically seeing other person's point of view. No backing down if m logically right but if m wrong, no harm apologizing.

I think you get the point.


(5) NEVER LET THE ROMANCE DIE

Frankly speaking - lifes too much fucked up otherwise. Your relationship may be the only saving grace for you in a day. So, treat it that way. If you love someone, dont let the romance die. And that doesnt mean goin on candlelight marches err.. dinner everyday or sitting outside watching stars; it means that telling the other person subtly how special they are for you. And this can be done through the simplest gestures such as making a personalised card/scrapbook on their b'day.

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Cant think of any more ways. If a relationship has to work, it will and it should. Everything should be done to save it. But if something isnt gonna work, it wont however hard you may try. Recognize that and if you fall in the former category - go all ass ballistic to work it out man!

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Cheers ....

15 comments:

Blasphemous Aesthete said...

Points taken.

Worthy notes. We all know them and yet, need constant reminding. Thank you :)

Cheers.

Alka Gurha said...

What you say is true, Mayank. One has to constantly work towards making it a success. The goals and interests have to be respected and trust matters a lot. But honestly one has to be lucky in love....

Priya shah said...

True ....

And they arent from any other random single dude.. they are from someone whos mature enuf to understand love, relatnships.. or as he says.. warships :)

Amazing post DG :D

chatterbox unplugged said...

hihihihi i can already see you sitting beside a hot Malaika and hosting MTV loveline, taking all those calls :D

Jokes apart. nice post

rashi said...

luvd it donnie!!! :D
points noted.... for my war-ships
Seems like someone had a real nuetral mood today!! :P

Anonymous said...

what if one is trying but other isn't even interested to work it out?.. all the above five points fail.. so does the relationship!

Sonia said...

True..

absolutely..

but I agree with the anonymous comment..
Nothing plays a greater role than your destiny or luck or fate when it comes to love n relationships..
Faith n trust matters a lot.. Understanding each other matters too !!

Nice blog DG :D

Nehha N Josshi said...

You've made valid points here.
I'd rather say 'Don't expect the other person to love you the way you love Yourself' :)

Have a great day!

Nidaa C said...

SPACE SPACE SPACE!!!
Do they ever get it?

Anonymous said...

If space is all we need why to search for love? Find any girl, who isn't in love with you.. She would give you all the space in world- even when you need her, or better go for an open relationship! No expectations, no commitment suckers, no "whats up?" "where are you?" "hw ws the day?" crap!!!
But dude if you really want some real war-ships as you put them, then the girl deserves a place in your messed up life, she deserves to know how you passed your day! Love isn't about sharing yourself completely BUT about about letting the person share your incompleteness with you. Either you never loved or don't know what it actually is. And yes, if space is all you need, go to NASA!! FTW!
- same person who ranted above, a little frustrated now!

DISGRUNTLED GENIUS said...

@Rashi , chatterbox, Blasphemous , Priya

Thanx :)

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@Alka.. Yep, Luck matters to some extent in many cases..

DISGRUNTLED GENIUS said...

@Anonymous

I didnt say u keep on trying even when futile. Ofcourse, if the other person isnt interested, the rlnshp isnt meant to be. So, no point wastin time & effort ...

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@Sonia, Neha.. Thanx :)

DISGRUNTLED GENIUS said...

@Nida..

Depends on the persons involved i guess. Some do, many dont.

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@Anon (again)..

I loved your judgmntal comment w/o even bothering to understand the post. Read the 'space' point again. I said that one needs their personal space - limits of which has to be defined by a person him/herself. If one cant even do that (am looking at you here, Anon) ; he/she doesnt know the difference b/w 'space' and 'smother'.

As for me, you dont worry. I have loved ..thats y i cn write this post.

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zephyr said...

Hey Mayank, came here after a long time and surprised to find you doing a serious post, but with all the colourful language. Well, a leopard and all that.... :)

Karthik P said...

Nice advice you gave there... :)