We the people - the stupid common citizens of this country. How naive we are that we think our Government cares about us. Varanasi blast and numerous other terrorist attacks have proved otherwise. Reality, ofcourse isnt what we believe - as evident from these sets of conversations between -
PM (Prime Minister) , Prince ( No.. not the kid who got rich by falling into a hole but - 'him' ) , CM (UP Chief Minister) and ofcourse - the stupid common man or, SCM .
CONVO. NO 1 : 'SCM' MEETS PM
SCM : Help me please! One more terrorist attack. Save my life and kill those bloody jehadis.
PM: Help you?? Arre bhai, first let me save my ass, no? 2G scam has been hounding my honest ass nowadays. I am going to plead..err.. meet 'Madam' and discuss the future.
SCM: Future? Of nation?
PM: No, you idiot.. MY future. FTW !
SCM: Wait! But arent you just a prop to keep the seat warm till Prince boy takes over?
PM: Err.. Watever ! Dont pass judgment on me. I am here because am very capable, you see?
SCM: Right! You cant even talk to save your ass. Scams take place under your watchful eyes and you dont / cant do anything about them. What a Hercules-isque PM really !
PM: See, you are hurt. Dont worry. We will ...
SCM (interrupting him): YA YA I know ! We will bring guilty to book. We share your pain. Maintain peace. BLAH BLAH Right?
PM: Wow!! How did you know what I was gonna say dude? You are a genius!
SCM: Junk it! I am used to your dialogues now. Thanks to your awesome hardline techniques, I witness a lot of attacks in a year and you say the same things after every one of them.
PM: Wateva bro! I am off to 10, Janpath. You have some problems.. go talk to Rahul Baba. He solves all my problems - vadda sohna munda hai. Go now, dont bug me!
CONVO. NO 2 : 'SCM' MEETS PRINCE
SCM: Sir, please solve my problems. Me, my family, my cities are in danger. Please!
Prince: Umm.. are you a Dalit?
SCM: WTF? Whats that got to do with it?
Prince: No, you see , I love to discuss and solve problems but only over dinner. And I can have dinner at your house.. only if you are a dalit.
SCM: What the hell? The problem is infront of you man!! You have to kill those terrorists and save my ass - the idiot who voted for you!
Prince: Umm.. well, you see , its all fault of the UP CM. She has turned the state into a mess. She doesnt care about the people. She..
SCM (interrupting): Huh ! This aint your campaign speech forum. I am begging you for help !
Prince: Hmm.. I think I will go and discuss this with Ma. Only she can help us all.
SCM: You dont have an opinion on anything, do you?
Prince: He he. Not really.
SCM: And you are our "PM-in-waiting" ?
Prince: Hehe. Yes.
SCM: Shoot me! FML !!
Prince: Umm.. hey, aint I young, charming and all that shit! Youth..esp girls love me, dont they?
SCM: That showed in Bihar alright!
Prince: Wateva! Am going. You please talk to UP CM. I think she can help you better.
CONVO. NO 3 : 'SCM' MEETS UP CM
SCM: Mam! Please help me! Save me from terrorists! How can they dare attack Varanasi - one of the holiest cities in this world?
CM: Abe. You a dalit?
SCM: WTF!! Does that matter?
CM: Haan! I hate Upper caste 'Manu-wadis'.
SCM: Wait. Those who get killed arenot Dalit, Brahmin, Hindu , Muslims. They are just .. dead.
CM: I dont give a shit. You see, I am busy in important things like upholding the honor of Dalit community.
SCM: What? How?
CM: Cant you see my statues? When Dalits see those, they feel proud and happy. And that makes me feel happy.
SCM: Let me see. You keep demanding funds from Central Govt saying state's coffers are empty but you built gigantic statues worth crores. People - dalits, brahmins etc - die of malnutrition and you think statues make them happy?
CM: Thats the beauty of it!
SCM: But dont you think if you actively pursue terrorists and nail them and their henchmen, people will be slightly more happy?
CM: Well, I can do that. Everyone can. But we love our citizens. And we cant displease a "certain community" just because some people went awry.
SCM: BUT! Terrorists have no religion ! Just kill them already! And if you dont kill them because you think it will displease people of a "certain community", dont you think you are indirectly saying they all are the same while the truth is they also hate these rotten apples among them.
CM: Huh? You speak too much. Fine! I promise an inquiry commission. Happy?
SCM: Yes. Terribly .. happy. I will go now mam. And I also promise - from tomorrow onwards, I will shower extra love over my family before I venture out.
CM: Why so?
SCM: Who knows? I might not come back .. all thanks to you guys, no?
SCM went home .. and slept. While those who are entrusted to make his life better - couldnt. Not because they were worried about him - but because everyone was involved in some scam or the other and they were worried how to save self-asses.
Long live democracy ... nay , democrazy !