I will never understand why we all love bakchodi so much. Theres so much around and it aint gonna end (even subside) in near future. This post 'analyses' two such bakchodis - which are nothing better than Rakhi Sawant's speech at the United Nations on matters of nuclear proliferation.
(1) THE 'EXPERTS'
'Experts' are people who think they are better than anyone else because they know so much about their topic. The reality, however, is that they are a bunch of hypocritic bakchods who dont deserve even 0.23 seconds of my attention. And within the 'experts' community, the stock market / economy experts take bakchodi to ridiculous levels. These people have some 'set' sentences which they utter all the time and now will be analysed for their real meaning as follows:
What Stock Market / Financial expert (SMFE) says: Invest in stock XYZ. Its future is bright.
What he really means: Damn! I myself have invested in XYZ! I have to make it sound attractive come what may else am ass-fucked!
What SMFE says: ABC company has good fundamentals. I have talked to their higher management and they seem upbeat about future.
What he really means: Fuck! I couldnt even get appointment to see the gatekeeper of ABC company. But I will make it sound good as I have bought its stocks! Lord, save my ass please!
What SMFE says: The economy will bounce back / grow higher in 6 months.
What he really means: I am just guessing! Besides, whos gonna remember what I said after 6 months anyways? FTW!
The grand economic recession of 2008-09 which struck at the same time my MBA placements were to start was the proof that SMFEs just guess everything and are utterly useless. The basic point is that these SMFEs dont know jack-shit about anything. They just pretend and earn millions for doing nothing. In this way, its a dream job and thats why they should be respected - for being the biggest weasels around!
Hats off to you fuckin morons!
(2) RECENT BARKHA DUTT , VIR SANGHVI etc AUDIO TAPE CONTROVERSY
If 2G scam wasnt enough, now comes the journalists' audio tapes controversy in which a PR professional, Nira Radia has been found talking to top journos like Barkha, Vir sanghvi etc. and the transcript hints at a possible media-politics-corporate nexus to install A Raja as the telecom minister.
Now, Bakchodi regarding any issue cant get bigger than this. Did we really think that journos are noble souls out to make India a better place? Frankly, whoever did really believe this needs to undergo a brain installment surgery - FAST! And in any case, this so called scandal is nothing infront of the 'Paid news' scam.
But you cant beat the netizens of our country in bakchodi. Within minutes of the scam breaking out, our "facebook and twitter activists" sprung into action. "I hate Barkha dutt" etc pages were created within seconds and 1000s became 'members' within a jiffy. Everyone wrote fancy stuff like "These people are corrupt" or "hang them" etc etc on twitter and FB and considered their responsibilities over. Frankly speaking, just as 24000+ followers on "I hate khap panchayats" wont stop those old frustrated dudes from killing young lovers; such 'internet activism' wont take us anywhere. It will always be a bakchodi and remain a convenient form of 'protest' for some dude/chick who loves Rang De Basanti and THINKS (only thinks, no action) he should really do something for the nation.
Lord save us from bakchodi ..........
Cheers . . . . . . . .