Monday, August 2, 2010

AN OPEN LETTER: JILTED GUY TO HIS EX- GIRLFRIENDS !

Disclaimer: Just an imaginative post concerning a random guy writing to his exes. Any resemblance to thousands of poor guys out there.. will ofcourse NOT be a co-incidence ! Any resemblance to me, however, is purely a co-incidence. Those who think otherwise.. have no way of confirming anyways.

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To whomsoever it may concern,

I am taking this opportunity to convey my deepest regards for the kind emotional atyachaar you girls have put me through! Ah! I remember those days when I was full of energy and innocence. When I used to believe that love is a real thing and not the crude thing they show in Mallu soft-porn movies (great timepass really!). Heck! I used to believe that love is the power that drives us. How naive I was!

But thanks to you all for teaching me a valuable lesson: Love exists only in two places > Shahrukh's movies and tacky rooms where Mallu couples mingle. Rest is all bullshit.

I sincerely thank you all for putting my mind through so much of pressure and crap that its fighting death nowadays and the only thing standing between its complete annihilation and life is beer.. loads of it!

There were so many moments when I cared for you so honestly and deeply. But sadly, you wanted pretensions. You didnot want a genuine caring bf.. you wanted flashy dudes; yeah that asshole who pretends to care but is interested in only one thing. Yup, the same guy who wants to go ballistic with every female species on two legs. And this attitude of yours pushed my mind further into a sinkhole.

What is with you anyways? You showed me valley of flowers in the beginning but as I got sucked further into your trap and started caring for you genuinely at the cost of some of my selfish desires, you started the age old routine of taking me for granted. Every idiotic issue of yours began to become bigger and bigger while my sensible issues were treated the same way as Commonwealth games organizers are treating the taxpayers' money.. yes: Flushing Down the drain!

While you expected me to understand your issues, mine took a backseat. You didnt give a rat's ass about my concerns but expected me to be a Barrack Obama with yours! And when sometimes, I got frustrated; you came up with gems like "You know, you have changed!" or the classic one-liner "You dont love me anymore!" . Yeah right! While you sleep peacefully at night, I feel like a chicken about to be "jhatka-fied" and I dont love you anymore??

Hell, while I believe in the concept that love is something to cherish, you come up with exact opposite stuff. We may have talked the whole day but I forgot to call you at night as I was dead tired (yes babe.. dead tired because I was working and earning so as to buy damn gifts for your 'numerous' occasions!) and you go Agnee missile on my ass. Convenient!

And dont get me started on that hypocrisy of yours. While you expected me to be a super-human ; you continued to be a "oh-galti-se-mistake-ho-gaya-sorry" type human. Imperfect, I mean. I was supposed to understand your unspoken words and your unsaid feelings while you conveniently brushed aside my visible pain because you are only human and cant understand every damn thing! Yeah Right! Thats what I call a bullcrap. Now I know how a fly feels when we squat the little prick brutally.

Eh, whats the use of grudge anyways? I dont think love will ever be the same again for me.. you know> SRK types; but who cares? Atleast I will be more cautious now. Heck, I still wont be the pretentious jerk whose soul / sole-motive is to "use and throw" but I will be cautious in one thing: I wont be the fly this time.. I will be the windshield.

Thanks, you morons .. goodbye and have a happy life..

Cheers
Sad guy (Applications for a new GF* invited.)

*Conditions apply
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14 comments:

rashi said...

Definitely not one of ur good write-ups.. :(
...in fact theres a ring of extrme hurt in it...Added to that, I felt it was very wrongy targeted to every girl...
as i know, guys can be worse...so Lets face it..thre r all kinds of guys n girls n the irony is...more than often they are wrongly paired...

Priya shah said...

hmm... nice writin but well highly anti-girls! Guys r more exploitative u know :)

Mayank said...

@Rashi , PS

Agreed... guys r also jerks, no doubt... The post hwever is only an entry (nt a viewpoint) fr this indibloggers' contest...

Giribala said...

vry vry emotional!

Rahul said...

sahi hai bhai.... girls get all the sympathy n guys r left at the mercy of beer :(..

awesome post bro....

Ankita Rao said...

aww.... i hope its nt ur story or smthng :) .. nicely written.. may b bit biased bt well, its the jilted guy here. If a girl writes, she wl bring her own views here :)

Keep it up dude !!

Shas said...

Hmm...sad :)

Mayank said...

@all ..

Thanks for visitin the blog n appreciatin :)

Mayank said...

@Shas

yeah.. sadly funny :)

"just a pen in my hand" said...

hahahahahahahaha......OMG.....that was awesome !!!!! Hell man , that was out of this world !!! No matter what anyone else says , U ROCK buddy !!! tk cr....cheers !

Riya said...

The lines towrds the end.. I wl b a windsjield nw, nt the fly... sum up the post.

Brilliant satire dude !

Management Punditz said...

U've written an awesome post dude!!!
Kudos for that..
I just broke up today and find every reason for my break up written over here.. I've even forwarded the letter's copy to my ex!!
Thanx for d post...

nikita said...

awsm dude....

i hope it isn't for all the girls...and it does happens with gals too...they are forced to be become one...cause of few idiots in their life....

it happens..

but had fun reading it too..

Mayank said...

@Just a pen.. thanks dude :)

@M. Punditz.. Thanks for the appreciation dude.. Keep visitin :)

@Nikita.. Nopes..not for every girl. Not generalising here at all.