Monday, April 26, 2010

THE GHOST OF ARRANGED MARRIAGES !


Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution.

~ Mae West

The legend (read: ghost) of arranged marriage has been haunting our country since the first neighborhood aunty (who definitely evolved from some irritatin chimpanzee) set her sights on some gullible bachelor and bombarded his / her parents with 'matches'.




Arranged marriages are just like a disease. Just like AIDS. In my view, only those people who are moron enough so as to not being able to find their life partners, deserve this shit. Marriage afterall is a life changing decision. And frankly, I dont think the remote control of such decisions should be in elders' or others' hands.

Many people give a shitty argument that parents know best and you should trust them out of respect. Well, my message to such 'still warped in 17th century' pricks is simple, loud and clear: they may know best but ultimately only you know how big a screw up you are. And thats why only you can find an equal screwup for yourself..not your parents. All they will do is find someone THEY like. And choosing your life partner yourself (a selfish behavior) isnot a disrespect to anyone. Its just simple respect for own god-damned mind.

Arranged marriages are basically a big gamble. Sometimes you win; mostly you lose. Most importantly, you dont know who you are getting. The guy/ girl in question will always be at their best behavior. And please, they wont EVER tell you about their past flings. Someone may be fuckin the colony postman / maid but they will always appear as angels during a meeting; unless ofcourse, they hate arranged marriages and tell you to piss off in no uncertain terms.

If you aint intelligent enough to find your own partner and wanna get married so that you can easily get laid w/o effort.. arranged marriage is for you. But if you have some semblance of self-respect, I say, get up your asses, live your life, enjoy it, meet new and interesting people and if (in the walk of life); you find someone as big a screwup as you, DONOT let them go.

I certainly dont think that in today's scenario, any intelligent dude (discountin 'never gonna get laid' types) will want to marry just any chic. Lets face it: We guys dont like marriages. Its got to do with our independence. But I respect only those who have the balls to tell their families that they aint marrying till they find someone to their liking. And for that reason, m sure that no girl will want to put herself up as a display object infront of any tom, dick and harry's family. You know.. bringing tea, lookin down and shy always etc etc.. yea, you get the point.

Anyhow, to end, heres a piece of gem (courtesy: click here)






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24 comments:

rashi said...

yet again!!! the genius in u is unleashed, donnie.. :)
keep writin..
Cheers.. :)

Priya shah said...

outdid yourself again :)

chatterbox unplugged:no room for pseudo sympathy said...

in todays time your views r fyn...wat abt some of our parents ?? they seem pretty happy....:) guess they were more adjusting than us , the genY !

Mayank said...

@ Rashi ... thnx don :)

@PS .. thnks fr tolerating the post :)

@Chatterbx : Every gen has its own rules and thoughts... Our parents seem happy yes.. but there r countless couples who hv simply 'adjusted'instead of being actually happy.

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indianhomemaker said...

Quotable quote, "And choosing your life partner yourself (a selfish behavior) is not a disrespect to anyone. Its just simple respect for own god-damned mind. "

Absolutley!
Love this post!! :)

shail said...

Good post and told as it should be, especially to those of the 'parents know best' types.
My only observation is regarding your, "We guys don't like marriages. Its got to do with our independence."
Guess what?? We gals don't like marriage either. Independence is something we love too!! :P

Sandhya said...

Making decisions for oneself is looked down upon in our society. I like the way your expressed it...lovely post!

Vishal Pipraiya said...

hey. i get the independence part about where you are coming from, but just hear me out. marriage frankly is as much about the practical aspects as it is about love. you fall in love with someone, wanna get married and do so, great! kudos! But the difference between India and other countries is the kind of family system we have here. Everywhere else, people leave their parents homes as they enter the teens never to come back, however Indian's continue to not only live with our parents till marriage but even beyond to take care of them in their old age. So, with a house having so many occupants it's only natural when a new entrant has to be decided upon the parents like to have their say in it. I don't really find anything wrong with arranged marriage. Think of it as a dating service (which Facebook and their likes are turning out to be, meeting new interesting people) that comes pre filtered with girls of your parents choice. if you agree with their choice and everyone is happy then what's the harm?

- The Virgin Author! said...

Love this post. And the cartoon specially. A great write up! :)


-
PS: Congratulations for the selection of this entry as the BlogAdda’s Tangy Tuesday Picks – May. 04, ‘10. One of my post is selected, too.

Mayank said...

@Sandhya , @IHH

thnx for the encouraging words :) ...

*****

@Shail

Agreed.. And nothin endangers it more thn sm random dude / dudette thrust upon u ! :P

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@Vishal

I undrstand what u r sayin but theres a simple ques: If you love sm1 n ur parents r cmpltly against her, will you just leave her? Marriage shld be a complete selfish decision even if u live in a joint family of 100 members. There isnt a need for anyone except self to like the prsn we intend to marry. And this aint disrespectin the parents yar..

Mayank said...

@Virgin author

thanx.. And Read ur post man.. pretty nice write-up ! :)

nikita said...

its like ghosts to me tooo...

i have s post for it - a fear that haunts me.http://littlepearlsofwisdom.wordpress.com/2010/08/03/a-fear-haunts-me/

sad....and being that shy girl,being decorated like a barbie doll infront of 10 people is so...very irritating..

sigh..

Mayank said...

@Nikita

Can imagine wht u must b feelin in those moments.. Its pretty shitty no doubt.. all in the name of A. marriages....

Anonymous said...

I always motivated by you, your views and attitude, again, thanks for this nice post.

- Mark

Anonymous said...

Man, really want to know how can you be that smart, lol...great read, thanks.

Deepika Vasudeva said...

nahi. i m in favor of arranged marriage.
for the point being that the those couples 'act' more sanely around each other... ain't that we always try to portray our best in front of everyone...mostly.
at least in this case parents have no objections whatsoever.

but yet again... a known bhoot is better than unknown vampire :P:P..hehehe

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Colonic Cleansing said...

On arranged marriages, I thought it doesn't exist in this era anymore.

Anonymous said...

how many time i do not do what i want to do but do what i dont want to do

Anonymous said...

I have been married for a decade now and it sucks big time for me. I don't want to get a divorce either. 'cos I don't want my daughter to miss either mom or dad.

Keyur700 said...

This is one of the best posts ever!! I more than 100% agree with you. Arranged marriage is terrible! How can you consider someone as the most important person of your life after meeting him/her just 3-4 times maximum?

Even I think that love marriage doesn't mean going against your parents. And it's a pathetic thought that parents know best. You have to bloody spend the life yaar so your choice matters!

I have also posted an anti-arranged marriage article. This is it - http://thecommonmanspeaks.com/2012/08/18/arranged-marriage-jokes/

Well done to you. Keep it up.

Regards,

Keyur :)

Keyur700 said...

This is one of the best posts ever!! I more than 100% agree with you. Arranged marriage is terrible! How can you consider someone as the most important person of your life after meeting him/her just 3-4 times maximum?

Even I think love marriage doesn't mean going against your parents. And it's a pathetic thought that parents know best. You have to bloody spend the life yaar so your choice matters!

I have also posted an anti-arranged marriage article. This is it - http://thecommonmanspeaks.com/2012/08/18/arranged-marriage-jokes/

Well done to you. Keep it up.

Regards,

Keyur :)

Anonymous said...

Gr8 post ..