Wednesday, April 7, 2010


" Life is a waste of time; time is a waste of life, so get wasted all of the time and have the time of your life " - Dilbert

Get me out of here !! This is a feeling one gets when it comes to their senses that world after all, doesn’t give a shit. Frankly, you may even be a page 3 pseudo-intellectual but ultimately no-one will give shit if you die (unless they were hoping for inclusion into your will).

Coming back to the feeling; there are always two behaviors attached to it: 1) You sit at one place and cry while self-pitying; 2) You vow revenge on the world. Trust me, if you are an evil genius like me, you will choose the latter ….. [EVIL GRIN COMMENCES]

Now, there are again two reasons why the world will like to put a whole tree up your ass whenever you try to communicate with them: 1) you are really a moron; in which case, I will join the world and screw you; 2) you are too good and the mahajan ka swayamvar-obsessed world doesn’t understand you. I like and support the second one.

Nowdays, m feeling like Daffy Duck really. Always ass-ed in favor of Bugs bunny- the less funny but supposedly cooler prick! Daffy always creates the funniest moments, gets its head shot off by Elmer Fudd, makes a fool of itself, does all the nice work and still gets the boot in favour of that good-for-nothing carrot munching rabbit.

The only time when Daffy was actually given some credit was when Bugs himself admitted that he aint anything w/o Daffy (Looney Toones movie- II). I felt like crying that day (If you wanna know why, scroll up and read this idiotic post again!).

And that’s why, its revenge time folks!

Now… I was originally thinking of joining IIT and studying nuclear physics so as to learn about making nukes and unleashing them upon this world. But well, I don’t think I can clear IIT-JEE; so I dropped this genius plan. I also thought of buying weapons online (a.k.a. 16th December- awesome movie but for that one scene where a terrorist group sells “stuff” online- TOO MUCH!) but well, you really cant buy anything with a credit limit that screams ‘You idiot! Get something into your account first!’ Silly Banks!

Now, just as I was running out of genius ideas, I stumbled upon a less fancy one. Just sit back and enjoy. Enjoy what? Again two things: Self-destruction of the world and self-pity. The former is a testimony to the fact that humans have gone bonkers! Obsessed over mind numbing reality shows, not having a heart, not caring to stoop to any levels just to conform to silly norms, blindly following idiotic things of religions etc… all these things suggest that I don’t have to have a plan for the world has done the dirty work itself!

And as for the other one: Self-pity.. well, its that only: For self. And as George Costanza (Seinfeld) put it: Highly under-rated! Keep it to self. Don’t share the pains. And, the next time you feel like just sitting in your room and being all sad and lonely, I say DO IT. Grab a coffee and some popcorn and enjoy it! Don’t go by what world preaches: ‘Thou should be strong’. My Ass! Infact, sitting and enjoying the self-pity phase... is itself a revenge on the world, aint it ?


Time for me to grab some popcorn now!



Anonymous said...

niicee... liked the daffy part :)

Mayank said...

thnx... thts the gut wrenchin feelin nwdays man !

Priya shah said...

nice one ... and i suspiciously believe you were in a real bad mood when you wrote it :) ..

Sapna Singh said...

same pinch for the feeling of revenge...and very interestingly put write up...i knw how frustratng it may get wen u pour ur heart out abt 'the world becomng a pain in ur a$$' and ppl say well said........P

Mayank said...

@PS ... i always m in a bad mood... hence these gems of wisdom :)

@Sapna... Rightly put. And the more frustratin it gets, the more numb u bcm..